“I love you but I’m not in love with you”
What happened to the love?!?
You got married thinking that you had something special. You really could see stars in each other’s eyes. You said “I do” because you thought you always would.
Then came the house and kids and jobs and school meetings and sports and a hundred other things. There is always something to draw you away from each other. You assumed that your love is strong enough to endure anything, so you let each other fall on the priority list.
Then comes the bombshell. In a moment of honesty, your partner says, “I love you but I’m not in love with you.”
It caught you off guard. You knew things weren’t perfect, but you thought things were going well enough. Sure, things have fallen into a rut, but you always thought things would turn around when you have more time and energy.
But when you think about it, you realize that:
- It’s been a long time since you really felt connected or you had fun together.
- You have felt lonely in this relationship more than you expected.
- You have been half checked out in the relationship.
- You traded happiness away for security, and you are not sure that it was a good trade.
- You spend more time engaged with social media and games than you spend talking with your spouse.
Maybe they are right. Maybe you should throw in the towel and hope for something better with someone else.
Maybe you should think again!!!
Imagine feeling close and connected with your partner again. What would it be like to catch their eye across the room and know what they are thinking without having to say a word? Remember when you looked forward to seeing each other at the end of the day.
You can have this again!!!
I teach couples (and individuals who want to save their relationship!!) how to reclaim the love they felt at the beginning of the relationship. Together, we identify what works well and make adjustments to the parts that have gotten stuck or fall into ruts. I show you how to clear away the walls that have built up and get in the way of feeling “in love.” You learn to use simple and straight-forward relationship habits to ground your relationship in security and safety without sacrificing closeness.
You will be amazed at the difference in a short time!!!
My recommendation based on twenty years of couples counseling:
10-12 weekly sessions to learn new skills and implement them
4 monthly check-ins for support and accountability
Imagine feeling completely different about your relationship in less than six months.
And having the confidence that the groundwork will be easy to maintain for years to come.
Don’t put it off any longer. Schedule a free phone consultation to learn how this can help your relationship.
When a couple has lost that “in love” feeling, it is usually because they let resentment, boredom, and hurt feelings build up and block the love they actually feel towards one another.Relationship tip #2
Most relationships do not need a makeover. Neither partner needs a personality overhaul. Instead, they need to make small changes in the way they interact so they can live well together.Relationship tip #1